where am i from again
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
You took a bar mat shot.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Randomize
