I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
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