this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Randomize
