RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize
