Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Two words: blizzard sex
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize