I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
