I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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