the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
Randomize
