How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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