You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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