Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
