I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Never ever ever ever ever ever give your number to a 30 year old at buffalo wild wings. Ever ever ever.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
