Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Randomize
