loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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