seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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