If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize
