so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
i love accidental penises.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Randomize
