Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
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