i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
now i know why i became what i already was.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
try to milk me bitch
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