Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
There are leaves in my underwear?
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