I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
