Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
Acid is not a monday night drug
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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