just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
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