Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
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