So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
