she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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