He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
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