My hand turned me down
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize
