I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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