I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
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