We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
