im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
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