dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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