one two three fourrrrnication!
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Randomize
