Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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