JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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