if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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