if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
Randomize
