Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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