Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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