i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
