Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Please don't give away my fajitas
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
