I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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