He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Randomize
