He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
