Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
