i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize