Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
