I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Randomize
