physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
did you just send me my own nude
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
Randomize
